Back to Black
by Holdontohope
Summary: Quintanna future fic. Drama, drama, drama!
1. Chapter 1

**This came to me today. I have never been to the places in the fic, so I am taking creative liberties. Spoilers through 3 X 07. T for language, and just in case.

"Heya San!"

"Yo, Lopez!"

"What up, chica?"

Santana Lopez waved to her classmates as she walked to her 10 am class of her 2nd year at Berkley. Never in a million years, would she have guessed she would wind up at Berkley. After she was outed by Finn, she realized she needed to do something to make herself happy, and that meant getting the hell out of Lima.

"Hey Santana, did you get that study guide done?" asked Mindy, one of her good friends at Berkley, as she walked over to Santana. She and Mindy were both in the pre-law program.

"Yep, did you?"

"Barely, had to get up early this morning while fighting off a raging hangover." Mindy said, while Santana tried not to laugh. That is exactly why she saved partying for the few and far in between occasions. Most of her classmates from McKinley would faint if they could see her now. Maybe it was the California air, or maybe it was the acceptance she had found, in a place way that was more diverse than Lima (or Lima Heights Adjacent for that matter).

Santana's phone vibrated in her pocket.

"I'll meet you inside Mindy, I'm going to take this." Santana found a bench and sat down and accepted the call.

"Hi mama! " Surprisingly Santana was getting along decently with her parents. Although they were shocked at first, by the time graduation rolled around, they became more accepting of her sexuality. It probably helped that she wasn't living under their roof, and there was not that high school rebellion tension anymore.

"Hey, did I catch you at a bad time? I hate to call you so early, but I really needed to tell you something."

"Oh my gosh Mom, is dad ok? Are you ok?" Santana said gripping the park bench.

"We are fine….it's Judy. Judy Fabray. She has been diagnosed with brain cancer, and it is inoperable." Santana almost dropped her phone. She and Quinn had kept in touch via Facebook, but hadn't seen each other since the summer before college. Quinn had decided to go to community college in Lima, so she could be near Beth.

"What? Since when? How is Quinn?" Santana asked.

"It was just diagnosed, Judy had been having really severe migraines and they just found out last week, and spoke with her yesterday about the severity. Quinn…is not doing so well. That is why I called. I know you guys grew apart, but, she would probably appreciate your call. To be honest, she was having a rough time even before Judy got sick. It is not my place to say why, I just think she needs a friend." Santana wiped away a few stray tears and took a breath, trying to focus.

"It's a four day weekend, I am going to come home."

"Are you sure? I know your classes are hard."

"Mom, it's Quinn."

"I know, sweetie. Let me book you a flight while you are in class today. Do you want her to know you are coming?"

"Thanks. No she would just try to talk me out of it, like the stubborn girl she has always been."

"Ok, I will email you the flight details. Love you."

"Love you too, mama." Santana hung up the phone, and tried to muster up the strength to go to class. She had no idea why this was having such an impact on her. Hell, she and Quinn had backstabbed each other during most of high school. Was this guilt? It didn't feel like it. She may be a smart girl, but she had no clue what her feelings were doing some of the time.

Her phone rang again, and she opened it, guessing it was her mom again.

"You forget something, mama?"

"Mama? You are so silly, S." she heard a giggle on the other end and froze.

"Brittany?"

"Yes! The one and only. Oh my gosh Santana, are you sitting down?" Santana stared down at the park bench and muttered "yep."

"Artie proposed! We are finally getting MARRIED! I hope our babies don't roll out of my uterus in wheelchairs though, that sounds painful." As Brittany rambled, Santana started sobbing quietly. It wasn't supposed to be like this. Santana and Brittany had taken a break when Santana left for Berkley, and Brittany to NYC. That four-eyed gimp had rolled his sneaky little way to NYC and well…now this.

"San are you there?"

"Umm..yeah. Wow, congrats Britt. I gotta go to class, I'm going to have to talk to you later." Santana ended lamely and closed her phone, fighting the urge to throw it on the sidewalk.

Worst. Day. Ever.

***So ends Chapter 1. Reviews make me want to go ride a unicorn!


	2. Chapter 2

** I have never been to the places in the fic, so I am taking creative liberties. Spoilers through at least 3 X 07. T for language, and just in case.

Santana walked over to the baggage claim, once she landed back in Lima. She grinned as she saw her Mom waiting, and stepped into her open arms.

"I have missed you, you need to come home more!"

"Missed you too, thanks for flying me home."

"Let's get your bags, and get you home."

"Actually Mom, if it is ok, can we stop by the hospital first?" Santana asked.

"Sure. I have a lot to fill you in on, on the way there though." Her mother replied, as they picked up Santana's bags.

A bit later, as they hit the road, her mom took a deep breath. "OK, I don't even know where to start. I told you Judy is not doing too well. They are giving her 6 months at the most, but that could change at any time. She is remaining pretty positive, and trying to be strong for Quinn, but you know how good the Fabray's are about facades." Santana nodded at that point. "Quinn….well I think I will let her tell you when she is ready, about what she has been going through. I will tell you she is not the Quinn you remember in many ways, physically or emotionally. Expect her to have even more of a guard up. But I know she needs someone she can trust."

"Mom, please tell me so I can prepare myself. What the hell happened?"

"Let's just say she was in a really bad relationship…"

"Was she abused? I swear on all that is holy, that I will go all Lima Heights on whoever it was-"

"You need to wait until you hear more, from her." Santana's mother cut her off, as they pulled into the hospital.

"Can you tell me where she is, and come back and get me later? I think I need to talk to her alone."

Her mother nodded, and quickly gave her directions.

As Santana strode down the hallway, she felt a knot building in her stomach. If Quinn was hurt she wasn't sure how she was going hold it all together.

She approached the room, and saw a blonde with her back turned to her.

"Quinn?" Santana said quietly.

As Quinn turned around, Santana froze. Quinn was noticeably skinnier, and she was wearing baggy clothes. Santana's eyes were drawn to her face, where she was sporting a large nasty looking bruise on her left cheekbone. Santana opened her mouth, but she couldn't find words.

"I don't want your pity." Quinn said softly, but firmly. Santana pulled herself together.

"I'm Santana Lopez, I don't do pity." Than softer she said, "I am just here just to be here for you."

Quinn stared at her for a moment, with her lower lip quivering.

"Get over here," Santana said softly, as she opened her arms up to Quinn, who hesitantly stepped into them, and then buried her face onto Santana's shoulder, her body shaking with silent sobs.

They stood that way for a few minutes, until Santana felt she couldn't stand up much longer. She guided Quinn gently over to some chairs, and held on to Quinn's hands, letting her continue to sob on her shoulder.

After a few more moments, Quinn sat up and rubbed her eyes. Santana noticed she didn't have any mascara on to smear. Quinn Fabray, without makeup? What the hell was going on.

"I'm sorry for crying so much…I just…haven't been able to at all…" Quinn muttered, avoiding eye contact.

"No need to apologize." Santana tilted Quinn's chin up, and made eye contact. "What the hell happened to you, and whose tires do I need to slash?"

Quinn almost smiled at that, Santana noted joyously at that.

"It was just a mistake. A big mistake, that I can't fix, and that you can't fix. I messed up, big time." Quinn said, stretching her neck from side to side.

"Are the police involved?" Santana asked quietly.

"Yeah, right. Would have made it worse." Quinn scoffed.

"I know that is a common stigma with domestic violence. I really think you need to talk to someone though."

"It wasn't domestic violence."

"I'm not stupid Quinn. You are a classic walking example of it."

"Santana. The person I was involved with did not do this to me."

"Then how the hell do you explain that imperfection to the most beautiful face in at least an 1000 mile radius?"

Quinn looked down for a moment, and took a deep breath.

"I can't tell you here. My mom knows, but I can't handle anyone else overhearing. Can we go someplace tomorrow?"

"We can go someplace, but you are telling me today. There is no way in hell I am going to get any sleep tonight unless I know exactly what is going on." Santana said firmly.

"I guess since you flew here from California, I owe you that much." Quinn said, a small smile toying at her lips.

"You sure do. How about this—we get Breadsticks delivery at my mom's house, and then talk there? You can spend the night, and we will bring you back in the morning. Sound ok?" Quinn nodded in response.

"Let me go say goodnight to Mom and then we will go. " Quinn stood up, and then hesitated before turning to Santana. "You can come in and see her, but I will warn you, I'm not sure which one of us is bleaker at this moment.

Santana followed Quinn into Judy's room. Judy was laying in her bed watching TV. When she realized it was Santana in her room, her jaw dropped open.

"Santana Lopez, what in the sam hill are you doing here?"

"Hey Judy, a little bird told me there was some amazing woman that was sick in the hospital, and I couldn't not grace her with my presence." Judy laughed and opened her arms up for a hug. Santana leaned forward and felt Judy really hug her—Santana tried to fight back her tears, but she quickly lost that battle, and she let the tears flow.

As Santana sat back down, Judy smiled at her and asked, "So are you and Brittany still going strong?" Santana turned pale, while Quinn quickly said, "Mom, didn't we talk about this like a year ago!"

"Oh sorry, Santana…"

"It's ok, we took a break when I started Berkley and we just drifted apart. Actually, I just got a call yesterday that she is engaged. To Artie." Santana said, biting her lip. She felt Quinn's hand clasp on to her own, and she looked up into hazel eyes.

"I'm so sorry Santana."

"It is what it is. Ex getting married, Judy's in the hospital, your best friend from high school is wearing a nasty bruise and looks like she hasn't eaten in a month..." Santana realized what she was saying and shut her mouth, after muttering a quick sorry. To her surprise, Judy chuckled.

"I missed you. You and those rants." Quinn said squeezing her hand. "You are one of the few people that I know will tell it like it is."

They made chit-chat for a few moments, and then noticed Judy yawning, and said their good-byes for the night.

"A moment alone with Santana please?" Judy asked.

"Sure Mom, I love you." Quinn said and walked out.

"How much has she told you?" Judy asked.

"Not much," Santana admitted. "She says she is going to tell me tonight."

"Please listen before you judge her. She has been through a lot, but my choice is to stand by her. I know I don't have a lot of time left, so I choose to be on her side. I know you wouldn't have come if you didn't have her best interest at heart, just be careful of how you react. I know you guys haven't kept in good contact recently, but I know you are one of the few people that she respects and trusts. Please help her Santana." Judy said, tears forming in her eyes.

"You got it. I did tell my mom I am ready to go all Lima Heights on someone if I need to." Judy laughed and they hugged goodnight.

Quinn was sitting in a chair, staring off into space. Santana touched her shoulder gently, and hazel eyes looked into brown. Quinn stood up, and they walked out of the hospital, into a rainy, dreary night.

***I am probably going to work on Chapter 3 right now as I have some ideas. Feedback would be delightful


	3. Chapter 3

** Spoilers through at least 3 X 07. T for language, and just in case.

Santana watched Quinn out of the corner of her eye, pick at her pasta and barely nibble at a breadstick, while Santana felt like she had been inhaling her food.

"Alright Blondie, since I can see my goal of getting you to eat, isn't going to work, how about we try the talking bit out." Santana said, pushing her plate aside, and going to lie down on her bed.

Quinn got up and came over and lay on the other side of the bed, and closed her eyes and breathed in deeply.

"You have to promise not to go to the police. Or anyone for that matter. Only your mom and my mom know."

"You told my mom?" Santana asked sitting up.

"Yeah, with my mom being sick I needed someone. And I trust her, and she has been so good to me, listening, giving advice." Santana nodded and resumed her position on the bed.

"I think the last time you and I really talked, I was dating some college jock. Well that didn't last very long. I decided I couldn't take any more high school type of antics, that I wanted someone who could actually carry on a conversation, that would take me to dinner, that would be real with me." Quinn said and sighed deeply. "So I tried different online dating sites, laugh all you want, but I thought that was the only way I could meet someone. Well that turned out to be a bigger joke than one of Mr. Schuster's vests. So I gave up and just focused on school. I was studying English Education, of all things." Quinn stopped and bit her lip.

"He did have really lame visits…." Santana added.

"So I found love when I wasn't looking, of course. At the gym, Zumba class."

"Ok, hold up. Quinn Fabray went to Zumba? And guys actually go to Zumba, I thought it was some chick thing-" Santana stopped and gaped at Quinn. Quinn nodded. "No way—I thought you were straighter than a board. Quinn smirked.

"I may have had some curious fantasies in high school, but I never would have dreamed on acting upon them, I was too caught up in other crap. So anyways, I met her, tall, dark and beautiful, and all kinds of curvy, with dance moves that mesmerized me."

"Name?" Santana asked.

"Hadley."

"Is she who did that to your face?"

"No..if only it were that simple."

Santana sat up. "OK am I missing out on something here? You go to Zumba, met a lady, realize you are a repressed lemon? Shouldn't we all live happily ever after?"

Quinn was quiet for a few moments, and Santana saw tears in her eyes.

"I'm sorry Q, I shouldn't have-"

"It's ok, really. It's just…well, Hadley was married." Santana gaped at Quinn. "I was an adulteress, I mean yes, Hadley was all too willing, but my actions made me a home-wrecker. We had been so careful, so sneaky. Until one day…." Quinn paused unable to continue.

Santana scooted closer to Quinn, "He did this to you?" Quinn nodded and started sobbing. Santana didn't know what to do, but hold her.

Quinn managed to catch her breath. "He came home early from a business trip, and found us in bed together. He began screaming and I tried to run out of there, and he grabbed me, slammed me against the wall, and created that bruise on my face." Quinn paused and tried to re-gain her breath again. "Yeah, it hurt like hell, but the worst part was the emotional pain. Hadley didn't try to stop him or anything."

"Women." Santana said and rolled her eyes.

"And then, he…he asked me if she had told me. And I looked at her, confused as to what the hell he was talking about. She couldn't even tell me, he had to yell it at me, in my ear. She was pregnant. She just sat there. I thought we were in love and that she was going to leave him. She couldn't even look at me, she just let me leave." Quinn broke down again, and Santana held her. She didn't know what to say to Quinn, this was one big old mess of a situation.

"Let it all out, I got you babe." Santana whispered to her. Quinn became even more of a blubbery mess, and Santana reached to her nightstand for some tissues. Quinn accepted them, and wiped her eyes and nose.

"I probably deserved this, after everything I have done to so many people." Quinn muttered through glassy eyes.

"No, don't you say that. No one deserves to be treated like that, especially you. I don't care what skewed perception you might have of yourself, but you are a good person. You are kind, funny, talented, strong, beautiful and amazing. So that bruise on your cheek, and that claw-mark she left on your heart were not warranted. And if this Hadley person wasn't pregnant, I'd go over there and give her a bruise. Because no matter what, that isn't how it should have went down. You deserve all those things you told me you wanted earlier—someone you can be real with, someone that gets you. Not someone that lets you go so easily." As Santana had been ranting and pacing, Quinn's eyes got wider and wider. She was speechless at Santana's rant.

"I…I can't believe those words you said about me. I look into the mirror and see none of that." Quinn admitted.

"Well, we better go buy you a new mirror, because if you want to move on, and focus on spending these next few months with your mom, you gotta make it worth remembering, make it special. And as tragic as this whole situation is, you can't keep wallowing in it. You are going to die of starvation before next week, if you don't eat. And no way in hell, am I going to sit back and let you do that. You mean too much to me Quinn, to your mom, my mom, our friends. You deserve to be more than this shell of a girl sitting in front of me. I know I have said too much, and I'll shut up now, but just know that you don't deserve what happened. You didn't walk into Zumba and announce 'yeah, make me into a victim.' You wore your heart on your sleeve, and you lived. And some crazy woman took advantage of your kindness, of your beauty, of your awesomeness. But don't let her win."

Quinn wiped at the tears that were streaming down her cheeks.

"I can't…I'm not strong enough." Quinn sobbed. Santana sat back down and took her hands.

"By ourselves, we are all weak. But you have people that love you. Let us help you, let me help you. Please Quinn." Santana pleaded.

"I'll try…but I'm so scared. I know that sounds weak and lame-" Santana cut her off by putting her hand over Quinn's mouth.

"It's ok to be scared—just don't hold it in." Quinn nodded in response, and leaned into Santana's arms, becoming a blubbering mess once again.

***Whew—I am wiped out after that. I have some ideas as to where this is going, so stay tuned! Have a great day, wherever you are!


	4. Chapter 4

** Spoilers through at least 3 X 07. T for language, and just in case.

*****Thanks so much for the many kind reviews! It really meant a lot to me to read them, and it looks like I will be continuing to write

Santana watched as Quinn lay sleeping in her arms. Quinn's face was still a bit red from all the crying, and there slight tear stains on her cheeks.

Santana couldn't believe that Quinn wasn't as straight as she appeared to be in high school. Santana thought she had awesome gaydar all this time. She tried to push those thoughts out of her head; the main issue was Quinn's fragility. She had seen what stress did to Quinn in high school, how crazy she could get. However, this time it appears Quinn was internalizing and that scared Santana—that wasn't typical Quinn.

Quinn shifted in the bed and snuggled her nose up to Santana's neck. Santana felt herself unconsciously stiffen. Apparently Quinn felt it to, as she opened one eye, quizzically at her.

"Sorry..I just…no one has cuddle with me since…yeah." She muttered. Quinn hesitated and then scooted over to the other side of the bed. "I didn't mean you have to go all the way over there, prom queen." She heard Quinn giggle into her pillow. Santana scooted herself closer to Quinn and blew on the back of her neck, and Quinn giggled again. It was the best sound Santana had heard in a long time.

"Don't make me come over there and get you, Quinnie. " Santana reached over the sheet and tickled Quinn's side and Quinn shrieked and smacked Santana on the belly with a pillow.

"Oh it is on Fabray! Santana grabbed her pillow and got Quinn on the legs, and a pillow fight ensued. It was mass ciaos, pillows flying, giggles and shrieks. At one point Quinn managed to pin Santana by straddling her, and they both struggled to catch their breath. They both froze when the realized what position they had ended up in.

Quinn reached down and pushed back a lock of hair that had fallen into Santana's face. She let her hand graze a moment and softly stroked Santana's cheek. Santana closed her eyes and tried to slow her heart rate down.

"Q…." she muttered, unsure of what else to say. She knew Quinn was fragile right now, and she didn't want to set her off. But this? She wasn't ready for anything, not in this context, not in the state both of them were in emotionally.

Quinn seemed to think the same thing and she rolled off Santana and flopped down next to her. They were silent. It became an awkward silence. Santana knew she had to say something, but what? She rolled over to face the blonde.

"Quinn, I think we let the moment get the best of us. Neither of us is ready for anything right now. We both are emotional wrecks, and I don't want to hurt you. You mean too much to me." Quinn responded by turning over and meeting Santana's eyes.

"I know. I just…you are the only person that I feel happy around, that I feel myself around. But you are right, I am emotional…and way confused about a lot of things. And you are too important to me…" Quinn finished and bit her lip, tearing up.

"Q, I don't want you to think that I don't like you or don't find myself drawn to you. You are so beautiful…but you are so fragile. So am I, but I have a meaner streak to me and the last thing I want to do…is push you deeper down into the darkness." Santana said, and she got up and walked over to the window to hide the tears that were forming. "I'm toxic. Even if we were both the most emotionally stable people, look at my relationship track record. The person I have been with the longest is Brittany, and I screwed that up. I screw everything up. I just….we can't…and you don't even know what your sexuality really is. I'm not a good person to experiment on—look at how confused that made Brittany."

Santana felt Quinn approach her and lay a hand on her shoulder.

"It's ok, San. I'm not asking anything from you. I know it would be crazy. I do still need a friend, and you are the only one that I can trust. Please, can we just forget about it?"

Santana turned around to face Quinn and Quinn gaped as she saw the tears in Santana's eyes.

"I…need some air…I'll call you in a little bit." Santana managed to blurt out, before grabbing her bag and running out of Quinn's room, ignoring Quinn calling her name.

She just let herself run, the crisp wind hitting her face, tears staining her cheeks. She finally let herself stop when she got to the Lima Park. She lay on the merry ground and closed her eyes, letting the tears fall. Even though it wasn't moving, she felt like she was spinning out of control.

She had been doing so well lately, focusing on school, no drama, no partying, and no girls. She knew she hadn't let go of Brittany, and now she was getting married to the very same guy who she chose over Santana at one point, in high school. She couldn't handle any more rejection, but she hated being alone.

And what the hell was this was Quinn? Until last night, she didn't even know Quinn was interested, or curious about girls. How the hell did they wind up from pillow fighting to Quinn straddling her? Just the thought of that got Santana's heart racing again.

No, no, she was not good enough for Quinn. Quinn was too fragile, too hurt, sand too sad. She would only end up hurting her, and she couldn't live with herself if she did that.

She felt a soft hand on top of hers, and she opened her eyes to see hazel eyes, looking worriedly at her. Santana didn't even try to hide that she had been crying. Quinn held out some tissues and Santana wiped her eyes and cheeks, but she couldn't wipe away the salty taste, or Quinn's concerned gaze.

"I don't know what I did, but I'm sorry. Please, just talk to me." Quinn said, while Santana continued to sob. "I know that you are scared of trusting people. I'm scared too. And until I looked into your eyes a little while ago, I thought I'd never feel a spark again. But I can't…maybe you are upset that I said I would forget it? I honestly won't be able to. I don't even know what I am saying or doing. Gosh, I feel like I'm in high school still, so awkward." Quinn said, and Santana mustered a small smile at that.

"You're right. I can't forget it, but I want to. I just…I'll end up hurting you…I can't…." Santana said, crying harder now. Quinn lay down and held her, and stroked her hair.

"How about this, we don't forget that spark we just had, but we are just aware of it. And we just keep moving forward, as friends…and in a few days you will be going back to California anyways." Quinn said biting her lip, and avoiding eye contact. Santana turned Quinn's chin back to Santana and they held each other's gaze.

"Just kiss me." Santana whispered. Quinn's eyes widened.

"Say what?"

"Just kiss me. Find out if that spark even meant something. Find out if you msaybe really do only like girls. Find out if you like me, even with all my crap." Santana said, surprising Quinn, and surprising herself. Maybe besides her evil personality Snixx, she had her romantic personality, Snuggles. Quinn was quiet; she could tell Quinn was trying to decide.

She met Santana's gaze again, and Santana felt butterflies in her stomach. Was this really going to happen? Quinn scooted closer to Santana, and she felt the blonde's warm, quick breathing. Quinn paused, and Santana squeezed her hand for reassurance. Quinn leaned in, and lips met lips, and time seemed to stand still. It was a chaste kiss, with both mouths remaining closed. Yet, it lingered, it was un-hurried. When Quinn finally pulled away, she muttered a soft "oh." Santana, for one of the times in her life was speechless. Sure, she and Britt had some pretty steamy moments, but that kiss—that was like nothing she had ever felt before. The two held each other's gaze, yet didn't feel the need to speak; too many words had already been said.

Their moment was broken by a muted "hello?" Both girls snapped their heads up and were met by two sets of curious eyes, one blue and one brown.

**I am not sure if I am entirely happy with this chapter. I may come back and edit it.


	5. Chapter 5

** Spoilers through at least 3 X 07. T for language, and just in case.

Quinn and Santana quickly sat up, Quinn blushing, and Santana gaping with her mouth open.

In front of them stood Brittany Pierce and Rachel Berry. Santana opened and closed her mouth several times, and rubbed at her eyes.

"You are probably wondering what we are doing here, in Lima?" Rachel prompted and Quinn and Santana both nodded. "Well, you see, Brittany here plans to get married here in Lima and is here for the wedding planning. Since her two best friends from high school seem to be not answering their phone this past week, she has enlisted my spectacular help. What are you two doing here?" Rachel said, while Brittany remained silent.

"I live here Berry." Quinn said shortly.

"I'm home visiting my family, and have been hanging out with Quinn." Santana said, not wanting to spill Quinn's secrets.

There was an awkward pause, but leave it to Rachel to fill in the silence.

"I'm just going to go ahead and ask, did my eyes deceive me, or were you two…kissing? Last I checked Quinn was not into girls." Quinn flinched as Rachel spoke, and Santana felt Quinn's grip on her hand tighten.

"Last I checked, we weren't close friends Berry, and it's none of your damn business." Santana said clenching her free hand into a fist, out of reflex.

"Santana." Brittany spoke for the first time, in hardly more than a whisper. "Don't be mean."

"You don't get to tell me what to do anymore, Brittany McWheels. " Quinn tried not to laugh at Santana's latest nickname creation. "And don't even make that face at me."

"You really haven't grown up have you Santana. Still tearing people down, and now that you no longer have Brittany to control, it looks like you have found a new victim in Quinn." Rachel said snidely.

"Don't you try to act like you know anything about me Berry. Santana is not in control of me." Quinn said through gritted teeth.

"Oh whatever Quinn, you know she is just trying to get into your pants." Rachel retorted. Santana saw red and before she could stop herself, jumped up and got right into the other brunette's face.

"You need to leave now, before this gets ugly. You don't know what Quinn has been going through or what I have been going through. You don't see me trying to judge your life, or your choices. Leave me alone. And take Brittany with you. Please." Santana said firmly, anger flashing in her eyes.

Rachel exchanged glances with Brittany, who shrugged her shoulders. They both hesitated, and Brittany exchanged a lingering glance with Santana, before turning to walk away.

Santana sank down into the grass, still shaking from rage and sadness. She felt a gentle touch on her shoulder, and turned to see Quinn kneeling beside her.

"I hate Lima, stupid town. Crazy people." Santana muttered. "Well, except for you."

"You are still hurting, even though it's been awhile, huh?" Quinn asked softly, and found her response in small tears welling up in Santana's eyes.

"I trusted her, I thought I was enough for her. " Santana sobbed.

"And now you are afraid to trust again, to get hurt again."

"Yes, but I'm afraid of making you feel like that also." Santana responded.

"So, are you suggesting friends with benefits arrangement?" Quinn asked, raising her eyebrows, and Santana bit back a smile.

"No, that wouldn't be healthy for either of us. Maybe we can be in the "talking" stages of a relationship, as they put it. That way if either of us feels that we just can't…than we have an out."

Quinn thought for a moment and then nodded. "I think that sounds like a happy medium….but is it feasible, long distance? I mean, I know that was part of the strain for you and Britt."

"Well I'm not moving back to Lima." Santana said and both of the girls laughed softly. "Maybe..no, never mind."

"Maybe, what?" Quinn asked curiously.

"I was going to say, come to California…but Judy…." Santana said quietly.

Quinn was silent. "How about this, we try the distance thing for a few months, and then re-evaluate, depending on how my mom is doing, and how we are feeling about each other. And we plan some meet-ups, both in California..and in lovely Lima."

"Sounds perfect. Now can we continue what we were doing, before we were so rudely interrupted?" Santana asked, and Quinn laughed, and leaned in for a kiss.


	6. Chapter 6

***You are super lucky readers—2 chapters in one night. I felt like I had another chapter in me tonight, so here it goes!

"I hate this." Quinn said as they lingered by the security line at the airport.

"I know, this sucks…." Santana said, putting her boarding pass into her purse and stepping forward to embrace Quinn. Quinn fought back tears as she inhaled Santana's smell.

"Call me when you land?" Quinn asked, biting her lip.

"The minute they let us get our phones out."

They stood there for a moment, neither one wanting to let go. Santana stepped back a half a step and looked intently into Quinn's eyes.

"I really want to kiss you right now…but I don't know how you feel, since we are in public.." Santana said hesitantly. Quinn smirked at her, and locked lips with Santana, and pulled back and kissed her on the nose.

"Please go now, I can't handle this if we prolong it much longer." Quinn said and Santana nodded. They hugged one more time, and with a squeeze of Quinn's hand, Santana sauntered to the security line.

After she passed through, she turned around before going to her gate, and blew Quinn a kiss. Quinn returned the kiss.

Both girls walked away, with tears in their eyes.

Hours later:

Santana threw her bags down by the couch with a groan. Flying wore her out. That goodbye also made the trip a bit more difficult. She had already called Quinn when she landed, but she was tempted to call her again just to hear her voice…would that be too needy?

She decided it probably would, so she decided to text Mindy to see if she wanted to get take out.

A while later, Mindy arrived with bags in hand.

"Hey stranger, nice of you to grace us with your presence again." Mindy said, giving Santana a hug.

"I missed ya, girl." Santana said with a smile. "Now, let's eat!"

They chit-chatted as they ate, with Mindy filling Santana in on the gossip and the homework she had missed.

"So how was your family? And Quinn?" 

"My mom is doing well, didn't really even try to see the rest of them. I was pretty tied up with Quinn's situations." Santana paused. Apparently she must have paused for a while as Mindy snapped her fingers.

"You ok?" Mindy asked curiously.

"Yeah, I just…well the trip wasn't what I was expecting. Quinn's mom is not doing so well and Quinn has also had some rough patches."

"Is she ok?"

"No, but she is getting there."

"I feel like you are leaving out a ton of details."

"Well, I don't know how much of her story is mine to share. And well…" Santana paused. "We kind of kissed, like more than once." Mindy's jaw dropped.

"I thought Quinn was straight?"

"So did I, believe me. I mean, sure I had looked at her before, but I knew she was straight, so I knew not to even think about it. She was in charge of the celibacy club for crying out loud."

"Did you guys, you know…"

"Gosh no, Mindy! Her mom is dying, we aren't really sure what we are relationship wise, and neither of us has had action for a while. It would have been a recipe for disaster."

"Oh my gosh." Mindy said grinning.

"What?"

"You really like her, don't you? You are never like this."

"It's Quinn. She's just…breathtakingly beautiful, smart, charming, kind…but she's also broken and she knows it's not all rainbows and butterflies. I think that was always hard with Britt, she expected things to be perfect. But Quinn and I, we have been through some shit. We know it's hard to get out of bed each days. Now, it's like we have a reason to get up, it's like I have this hope that I didn't have before." Santana said, sighing happily.

"Well, hold on to that hope." Mindy said smiling softly.

Meanwhile, back in Lima….

Quinn got up from beside her Mother's bed and stretched, while walking to the window. The world seemed so peaceful outside the hospital; people were just going on with their lives.

Even though her relationship with her Mom, had a rocky past, they really had become a lot closer over the last few years. And now the person who loved her unconditionally, was close to leaving her.

Quinn sobbed silently into her hands. She knew it should be easier, she had time to say goodbye, but she didn't know how to say goodbye, she didn't want to face the inevitable.

And gosh, she missed Santana already. She wanted to call her again, but she thought it would seem too needy.

"Quinnie, are you ok?" Judy said softly.

"Yeah mom, just thinking about things." Quinn said, going over and sitting back down.

"I hate to see you so sad, talk to me."

"Oh it's silly, I just hated to say goodbye to Santana. I miss her already."

"You seem so happy around her, I don't know if I have ever seen you this happy before."

"I know it's odd mom, me being with a woman-"

"No, it's not odd. I just want you to be happy, and to be loved."

"Mom," Quinn sobbed out. "I don't want to say goodbye to you, this isn't fair, you can't leave me." Quinn sobbed, as her mom stroked her head.

"I know, I don't want to leave you either. You are the best thing that ever happened to me. I know it sounds clichéd, but I will always be with you. When you get your degree, when you get married-to Santana of course, when you guys have kids….you two are going to have a beautiful life, I just know it." Quinn gave a slight smile to her mom.

"I want those things mom, but not without you being there. You are my best friend, I wanted you to walk me down the aisle."

"Oh sweetie, I would have loved that." She said, wiping tears off of Quinn's cheeks. The two sat their in a tearful silence until Judy fell back asleep.

Quinn felt her phone vibrate her pocket. Thank goodness, it was Santana.

"Hello," Quinn said, her voice wavering.

"Hey sweetie, I hope it doesn't seem too clingy, calling already-" Santana said as Quinn cut her off.

"No, it's not. I wanted to call you earlier," Quinn said through her tears.

"What's wrong?"

"Oh, just really emotional heart to hearts with Mom. Just about how I don't want to tell her goodbye, how I wanted her to walk me down the aisle someday…by the way, not to freak you out, but she thinks you and I are going to get married." Quinn said, bracing herself for Santana to start into a rant, but to her surprise she heard a light chuckle.

"I'm not freaking out, my mom said the same thing."

"What did you say to her?" Quinn said curiously.

"I looked like a fish, just kept opening and closing my mouth." Quinn giggled at the image. "And then I told her to get out of my head, cause I was daydreaming about that very thing."

"Marrying me?"

"No, Principal Figgins, of course you." Quinn chuckled at Santana's sarcasm, she had such a knack for making her laugh.

"I dream of that day too, San." The girls were silent on the phone for a few moments. "San…are you..crying?" Quinn asked in disbelief.

"Maybe…alright, yes. Happy tears, when I think about being with you. I'm turning into a stupid mushy girl."

"It's not stupid, I think it is rather endearing." Quinn said.

"You know what I just realized?" Santana asked.

"Hm?"

"Even though we are talking about marriage of all things, this feels like the least awkward conversation we have had since we kissed."

"You are so right, does this mean I get like a prize or something." Quinn asked.

"Yeah….let's see. I will even give you a choice. I can either make you breakfast next time we are together, or you can now have the title of girlfriend." Santana said, and Quinn almost fell out of her chair-she wasn't expecting that.

"Q? You still there? Oh my gosh, I spoke too soon, what an idiot Lopez-"

"Santana! You aren't an idiot. I just was shocked. I pick the second one though."

"Really?" Santana said, almost squealing with excitement.

"Yes, I would be honored to be officially your girlfriend." Quinn replied.

"Good. I will work on shipping you a t-shirt that says "Property of Santana. Touch this and you DIE!" Santana cackled into the phone.

"I'll be sure to wear that into Lima Heights Adjacent…."Quinn said rolling her eyes.

"In all seriousness Q, thank you for saying yes."

Judy stirred in her sleep, and Quinn took that as a good place to wrap up the conversation.

"Hey, I think mom is waking up, so I better let you go…girlfriend." Quinn said smiling.

"I'll talk to you later…sweet dreams."

As she put the phone down, Quinn hugged herself, while grinning like crazy.

"Ahhh my little Quinnie has a girlfriend," Judy said laughing.

"Mom! How long have you been awake?"

"Long enough…I'm happy for you Quinn. Now get some sleep, those bags under your eyes are not becoming on you at all.

***I've got some things in store for this story. Stay tuned!


	7. Chapter 7

_A month later_

"Stupid, stupid computer." Santana muttered as she was frantically attempting to finish a paper that was due tomorrow morning. She was stocked up on energy drinks, some carrot sticks, and oddly enough—some tracks of Glee club. She had to make sure Berry never found out about that.

She heard her phone ringing, and she searched around the stacks of papers until she found it. When saw it was Quinn, her face lit up.

"Hello beautiful girlfriend." Santana said smiling into the phone, but immediately stopped smiling when she heard sobbing on the other end. "Quinn? What's going on, sweetie?

"A month." Quinn managed to sob out, and Santana froze. "That's all they are saying she has left, if that." Santana felt tears roll down her own cheeks, partially for Judy and partially for Quinn. She hadn't been able to get back to Lima yet, but she had some good phone chats, with both of them.

"I…I'll be on the first flight out this weekend." Santana said knowing that being there over the phone wasn't going to be enough for Quinn right now.

"Are you sure? I know it's near finals."

"Actually it is finals this week, if I can get everything turned in, I could be in Lima for the rest of the summer." Santana said, already composing a mental to do list of what it would take to make that happen.

"Really?" Quinn said through her tears.

"Of course. Are you still at the hospital?"

"No, Mom made me come home to sleep, as if I possibly could." Quinn said with a bit of her old, snarky tone, and Santana tried not to chuckle.

"How about you get in bed, and I sing you some lullabies." Santana said softly.

"K." Santana heard shuffling and then Quinn said "ready." Santana started singing some soft, tender songs she remembered from her childhood, and sure enough within minutes, she heard Quinn snoring slightly. She hung up the phone, and jumped up and started moving frantically to get things done.

_**2 days later**_

Santana walked towards the baggage claims of Lima's airport. She was expecting Quinn, but was surprised to find her Mother instead.

"Mom? Where is Quinn? Is everything OK?" Santana asked frantically.

"She's ok, she's at the hospital.. She just won't leave Judy's side. She apologizes for not being here."

"Please, take me to her." Santana asked, as her Mother embraced her.

The drive over, was filled with chit-chat about school, family and random Lima gossip. Santana leaned over and gave her mom a kiss on the cheek as she dropped her off at the hospital.

Santana made her way through the corridors, to Judy's room. As she got nearer, her steps quickened in anticipation of seeing Quinn. She quietly opened the door to reveal Judy asleep in her bed, and Quinn passed out in a recliner nearby. Quinn's beauty still took her breath away. The blonde was sleeping peacefully, mouth slightly open. Santana tip toed over to the recliner and gave a gentle kiss to Quinn's forehead.

Hazel eyes fluttered open, and quickly filled with tears, as she stood up to embrace Santana.

"I've missed you so much," Quinn sobbed into her shoulders.

"Same here—long distance sucks. " Santana said, brushing the tears off her cheeks and leaning in for a kiss. Quinn's tongue asked for entrance, and Santana granted it, and the two kissed passionately, trying to make up for lost time.

"It's nice to see you too, Santana." Came Judy's voice, and the girls broke apart, blushing. "Oh girls, I didn't care if I catch you kissing, you aren't in middle school."

"Hey Mama Fabray." Santana said gently hugging her. "How are you feeling today?" Santana stood back up and held Quinn's hand, squeezing.

"Oh just peachy keen, never better." Judy joked, and Santana felt Quinn stiffen.

"Mom, please." Quinn whispered. "I know you are just using the humor to cope and try to stay strong, but it is not helping me at all."

"Quinn." Judy said firmly. "I will not have this be a room of sobbing and sorrow. I'd like the end of my life to be peaceful and loving, and full of joy and laughter."

"I don't know if I can do that." Quinn said, as tears started to fall down her cheeks. "I can't just sit here and watch my Mother die and make knock knock jokes, or laugh about the Kardashins. Nothing about this seems fun to me, I just can't—" Quinn broke off as she quickly departed the room.

Santana started to go after her. "Wait Santana, I think she may just need a few minutes. She has been increasingly like this over the last few weeks. She'll come back in shortly and apologize, if her pattern repeats herself." Judy said softly.

Santana sunk into the recliner and sighed. "She isn't doing so well…what can I do? What am I supposed to do?"

"Just what you are doing—be here. Kiss her, hold her, make love to her." Judy said chuckling while Santana blushed. "Have you two?"

Santana shook her head no, not believing this conversation was really happening.

"Well, it's a good stress reliever, maybe you should take her home and-"

"Please, Judy. I can't have this conversation with you, it's rather mortifying." Santana said, and they both wound up laughing. "I actually wanted to talk to you about something more serious, if you are up for it."

"Of course, Santana." Judy said and sat up a bit in her bed, and gazed intently at Santana.

"As you and I both know, life is fragile. If there is one thing I have learned through this situation, is that life is short, and we need to make the best of the time we have, and love like crazy." Santana paused and Judy nodded thoughtfully. "I know that Quinn and I will get married someday, I just can't see myself being with anyone else. I also know that it breaks her heart, that there are so many firsts that you won't get to be here for…it devastates me, and I know you are going to miss those moments too, more than you would ever admit to Quinn."

"That's for sure." Judy replied, wiping a few stray tears away.

"Which is why, I want to ask your permission to marry Quinn. Not in two years, five years, but in two weeks." Judy's jaw dropped open. "I want you to walk, or wheel, or whatever her down the aisle. I want you to get to celebrate with all of us, I want one last fun memory for both you and Quinn—and for me. I haven't asked Quinn yet, but I'm fairly certain she will either say yes, or faint and then say yes….so, please. Can I marry your daughter?"

Judy was full on crying now, and she took a few moments to regain her breath. "Oh Santana, of course you may. I know you think everyone thinks you are a harsh bitch, but you are really one of the kindest people I have ever met. My Quinn is so lucky to have you. And I would be honored to be your mother in law, and to be there on your big day." Judy said and the two embraced, and Judy gave her a wet kiss on the cheek.

"Are you two ok?" came a soft voice from the doorway. They sat up to see Quinn, looking apologetic.

"Ask her." Judy whispered to Santana. Santana stood up and walked towards Quinn, stopping a few steps in front of her.

"Quinn, you have made me so very happy. We all here know how quickly life passes us by….and I know I don't want to spend another day without you." Quinn looked puzzled as Santana was speaking. Santana got down on one knee, and Quinn's eyes widened and shot back and forth between her Mother (who was still crying, of course) and Santana.

"Lucy Quinn Fabray, will you marry me? And will you agree to a whirlwind wedding in two weeks, so your Mom can go down the aisle with you?" Santana said and held her breath.

***Cliff hanger!


	8. Chapter 8

**Here we go—I apologize for the spacing issues I seem to be having. My word doesn't want to do paragraph breaks!

Quinn's response was a thud, as Santana flailed to catch her head before it could hit the ground.

"I didn't think she was actually going to faint, oh my gosh. What do I do?" Santana turned around to face Judy, with panic all over her face. Judy was also caught off guard, so all she was able to do was press the call button on her bed.

A nurse came in and saw Quinn on the floor and knelt down beside her. "She has a strong pulse, what happened?"

"I think she fainted, I said something that threw her a little off guard." Santana admitted.

"Go get a cold towel from the bathroom, please." The nurse said, and Santana scampered off, and came back with a towel, which the nurse put on her forehead.

"After fainting, most people come around within a few moments. We will just need to give her some time and space when she comes around." Santana nodded in agreement.

Sure enough, moments later Quinn's eyes fluttered open. She looked puzzled for a second, and then locked eyes with Santana. "Yes, yes, a thousand times yes." Quinn said, her eyes brimming with tears.

"I don't have a ring yet, I didn't realize until today how much I wanted to be with you forever."

"I don't care about a ring. I don't care if we get married in this hospital, none of that stuff matters." Quinn said, slowly sitting up. "I love you, San." She said as she gently kissed her, very much aware that her Mother and the nurse were still in the room.

"I can see that you are ok now, young lady. I will give you guys some privacy…but just so you know, you two are the cutest couple." The nurse said, smiling as she went out the door.

"Mom, is this ok?"

"Yes, yes, that is what Santana was talking to me about before you arrived. I am so happy for you, and so excited to be able to go. It will be the party of a century." Judy said, as Quinn got up to embrace her. "But dear, don't you think you should invite your father. "

Quinn and Santana instantly stiffened, and Quinn thought she heard Santana let a low growl out.

"I don't think that is a good idea…Santana might go all Lima Heights on him." Quinn said softly, as Santana nodded in agreement. "And I don't think he responded too well to that whole mix up I was in earlier. He wasn't even mad that I was abused, he was mad that I was with another woman. I know that you are all loving and forgiving, but I don't want him to ruin the best day of my life." Quinn pleaded.

"You need to give him another chance, Quinnie."

"No. He has had more than enough chances." Quinn said, stepping back slowly from her Mother. Quinn started breathing heavily, and Santana knew the floodgates were about to open. "He chose to not love me as a chubby little kid, he chose to kick me out, he chose to leave you, and he chose to not accept me for who I am. He made those choices, and now I am making my choice to not have him involved. He can come visit you in the hospital if you chose to see him, but there is no way in hell he is coming to my wedding." Quinn said striding out of the room.

Santana's eyes had been going back and forth between the two Fabrays, and as soon as Quinn left, Santana followed her out of the room.

"Quinn, wait up, please." Santana said, almost having to jog after Quinn, who was walking at a very rapid place. Quinn kept walking, so Santana picked up her pace, until she caught up with Quinn and grabbed her wrist and turned her around.

Quinn's eyes were full of tears and she looked like she was struggling to breathe.

Santana enveloped her into an embrace and whispered to her "Breathe sweetie, I got you. You are ok." Santana continued to murmur in her ear, until she felt her breathing return to normal.

"Can we leave, please?" Quinn whispered, and Santana took her hand and led her to the parking lot.

Once they returned to the Fabray residence, Quinn went and got into the shower. Santana slipped in with her and held her tightly, kissing her gently. Santana washed Quinn's hair, and Quinn closed her eyes and sighed.

"That feels so good."

"I know how else I can make you feel better." Santana said waggling her eyebrows.

"You are so bad, do you ever not think about sex?"

"Nope, I'm as a bad as a teenage boy. But that is not really what I meant. I was thinking a good dinner, some wine and a comedy."

"Sounds perfect, you are the best fiancée. Oh my gosh, I get to say that word." Quinn giggled as Santana rolled her eyes.

"Meet you downstairs." Santana said as she stepped out of the shower.

Quinn got out and dried off, and found some comfy clothes. Picking up hr phone, she saw that she had five missed calls from the hospital.

"Shit, shit, shit." She said as she checked her voicemail, and quickly ran downstairs.

"Santana, we have to go. Mom's taken a turn for the worse." Quinn said, and the two hurried out to the car.


	9. Chapter 9

**Thanks to my reviewers for reading. A special shout out to pencilinacase and thankyouglee or your very kind reviews!

The car ride to the hospital had seemed to take forever, and once they arrived Quinn was running through the halls, with Santana close behind her. 

As they approached her mother's room, Quinn slowed her pace and tried to catch her breath. Santana came up behind her, placing a hand on her back and rubbing it. Santana grabbed Quinn's hand and led her into the room.

There were several nurses and doctors in the room, comparing charts and talking to Judy.

"Will someone please tell me what is going on?" Quinn asked and everyone looked up at Quinn, and there was a long pause.

"My symptoms flared up….and well, Quinnie, it's going to be sooner than they thought. All they can do now is make me comfortable." Judy said softly. Quinn barely even noticed the doctors and nurses quietly leaving the room.

Quinn stood frozen, unable to even cry. She felt as though all the emotion was void from her body. She was becoming numb. She wondered if it was to protect herself from all the pain she had been feeling. She felt Santana come up behind her and embrace her from behind. That was enough for Quinn to come back to her senses and she acknowledged that tears were starting to form.

"How much longer do they think?" Quinn said, barely whispering.

"Days." Judy said softly and Quinn felt her breath hitch. "Don't be mad Quinn, but I want to see your father one last time. I need to reconcile any feelings so he isn't left with any guilt. I need to tie up my loose ends with him."

"I don't like it, but I understand. " Quinn said and leaned into Santana who had been observing the scene with tears glistening in her own eyes.

There was a hush that fell over the room. All three seemed to be more aware of Judy's fate than they had been willing to acknowledge before.

It hit Santana like a ton of bricks. Before she realized it, she was sobbing and struggling to breathe. Quinn turned around, startled by her fiancée's emotion. They embraced, both sobbing and clinging onto each other.

After a few moments, Santana stepped away to grab some tissues—giving some to both Quinn and Judy. Santana sat on one of the chairs by Judy's bed, and Quinn sat on her lap, and held her Mother's hand.

"Quinn, my attorney has my most recent copy of my will. I have left you everything—the house, the car, what I have in the bank. If you don't want to stay in Lima, sell the house, and buy a house where you want to live. Go to school—follow your dreams that you haven't been able to lately." Judy said.

"Mom, can we please not do this?" Quinn asked, biting her lip.

"We have to Quinn. There are a few more basics for me to review with you, but my lawyer has the rest. In my bedroom there is a box on the shelf in the closet with your name on it. I have collected some things over the past few years that are important for you to have. They aren't worth any money, but they will be meaningful in other ways-"Judy said and was cut off by a knock on the door.

In came the towering figure of Russell Fabray. Quinn and Santana instantly stiffened, while Judy gave a soft smile.

Russell stepped in hesitantly, flowers in hand. His eyes met Quinn's and she was surprised to see actual tears in his eyes. Russell caught Santana's eyes, and his eyes shifted between Quinn and Santana, as if he was assessing the situation. He gave a small smile and a curt nod.

"Russell, thank you for coming." Judy said, reaching out her hand for his, as he grasped it.

"I think we will give you a little time alone." Santana said, trying to give Quinn a way to escape this situation.

"Please, there are things I need Quinn to hear as well. I have so many regrets." Russell said. Quinn looked down. "I know you may not want to hear it, but I am sorry for everything I have done. For the judgments I have made, for how I have treated both of you, as if you were possessions, not people. I know you can never forgive me, but I at least need to say it out loud."

Judy smiled and said "I have forgiveness in my heart, please don't hold any more guilt." Judy said tenderly.

Russell looked over at Quinn, who had ended up with her face buried on Santana's shoulders. Quinn was trying to absorb his words, and discern how she felt.

"I know this is an awkward time—but are the two of you dating?" Russell asked cautiously.

"Engaged." Santana said, and there was a silence in the room.

"Congratulations." Russell said, barely above a whisper. Quinn's head came up slowly from Santana's shoulder and she looked at him, puzzled.

"That's all?" Quinn said with disbelief.

"If you are happy, that's all that matters." Russell said, and Quinn held his gaze.

"How would you even know how to tell if I am happy, since you don't even know a thing about me anymore?" Quinn asked with snark in her tone and Santana squeezed her hand.

"Fair enough. I should have re-phrased it. You can marry whoever your heart is attached to, someone who will take care of you and protect you. From how the two of you look at each other, I can see that is true." Russell said slowly, trying to find the right words.

"You aren't walking me down the aisle if that is what you are trying to fish for." Quinn said suspiciously.

"You don't even have to invite me to the wedding, if you aren't comfortable with it. I will understand."

Quinn stands up with tears in her eyes. "I don't understand how you can just waltz in here and pretend like everything is fine. That you are ok with me being engaged to a girl, or even simply with the fact that I am a lesbian. Are you in some acting class now or something? This is not a normal way for you to handle things. Shouldn't you have verbally attacked Santana by now and flung me out of the hospital room?" Quinn said, pacing back and forth.

"My normal way of handling things has changed. I have gone to anger management and counseling, and that has helped me shift how I see things, and react to things. I don't need to pretend it is fine, because I really am ok with it. Truth be told, when you got pregnant, I was surprised. I never would have said it out loud, but I always wondered…the way you looked at your female classmates…." Russell said and all three women gaped at him.

"I didn't even know I was a lesbian." Quinn said defensively.

"Of course not, we had you convinced it was wrong. And you were so desperate to fit in, that would have made you stand out more. Yet, I saw the way you looked longingly at the girls in your class—Santana, Brittany, Rachel…all of them. At first I thought you were jealous of them, but then I realized you were looking at them, like I was looking at girls in your college-before I met your mom of course." Russell said and Quinn sat back down in her chair stunned.

"How come you never said anything to me?" Judy asked quietly.

"I worried that you would think I was crazy or I was trying to pick on her. I hate myself for not saying something in retrospect. Maybe if we would have loved Lucy for who she was, she wouldn't have felt the need for surgeries." Russell said and Quinn started to sob, and Santana sat by to console her.

"It's ok Quinn; my parents knew before I even realized myself as well, it's totally common." Santana whispered to her.

"I knew I was different but I thought it was because of how I looked. I didn't even realize." Quinn said through her sobs, and then a look of realization dawned on her. "You did know me enough. You knew me well enough to decipher that." Quinn said, meeting Russell's gaze.

"I did. I was too busy trying to be a manly man and have a good image, that I neglected you emotionally. I am so sorry Lucy Q." Russell said.

Judy and Santana exchanged glances, the two having remained mainly silent, in order to let this exchange happen.

Quinn stood up, and Santana worried for a minute that she was going to bolt.

Quinn surprised Santana, her mother, her father, and most of all herself, by embracing her father and sobbing on his shoulder.


	10. Chapter 10

Anyone still reading? Trying to decide if I should continue or focus on my other stories.


	11. Chapter 11

A/N-This story got the most responses for my stories to continue. I will try to work on some of the others that got smaller reviews if I am able. I will be focusing on this one and my other Quinntana fic, Soccer Mom. Pas de Deux and Softer Side should also see updates sometime soon. Thanks everyone for the feedback!

3 days later

Due to Judy's deteriorating condition, they decided to push the wedding up a bit. The only people they really wanted in attendance were their parents anyways. They were going to have it in the hospital's chapel, and the chaplain had been agreeable to do a same-sex ceremony.

The two had decided to keep it simple and elegant, with the focus being on each other and their families. They also wanted to avoid the stress that weddings bring.

So, an hour before the ceremony, Quinn was sitting doing her makeup in her Mom's room, but kept having to pause due to her Mom making her laugh so hard, at funny childhood stories. Quinn had brought over picture albums and there were some funny ones. Quinn had forgotten that she and Santana had been pretty close as toddlers, and there were some adorable pictures.

"Oh Quinn, look at this one." Judy pointed to a set of picture where the girls were about 3. The first was them examining a flower, the second was of Santana presenting the flower to Quinn, and the third was of the two girls hugging and smiling widely at each other.

Quinn felt tears brimming in her eyes, and took a few deep breaths so she wouldn't have to re-do her make up.

"She could always make you smile." Judy said. "You seem so alive when you are around her."

"I feel so alive, but it is this strange rush of emotions right now. I feel guilty for feeling so happy, when you are so sick." Quinn admitted.

"Oh Quinn, I consider it a gift, to see your happiness and joy. I don't have to die worrying about you being sad and lonely. I know your life will be filled with love and happiness. That is the most peace a Mother could hope for." Judy said and Quinn kissed her gently on the forehead before going back to finish her make-up and start on her hair.

S*S*S*S*S

Meanwhile, things were a bit more chaotic at the Lopez house, since Santana had overslept. She had just gotten out of the shower, and was blow drying her hair in a t-shirt and shorts. She glanced over to the mirror, and it hit her that she was getting married today. There had been chunks of time when she thought this day would never come. And she was getting married to Quinn, who had been a frenemy for most of high school.

"Santana, someone is here to see you!" her Mother called up. Santana was puzzled as to who it might be, but she yelled for them to come on up. She turned to rustle through her bathroom cabinet to find her round brush, and when she turned back around she was shocked to find Brittany in the doorway.

"Hey." Brittany said softly.

"Ummm…hi?" Santana asked.

"I heard you are getting married today."

"Yeah—we are just having our parents be there, keeping it small."

"I understand that it would be painful to have me there." Brittany said biting her lip.

"It's more that I didn't want my mistakes and regrets lurking around…" Santana trailed off.

"San, I know you have been holding a lot of the blame on yourself. It wasn't just you—don't forget that, and let it interfere with your relationship with Quinn."

"Britt—I truly am sorry for everything."

"No need to apologize….Maybe, it was just the way it had to go, so you could end up with who you are supposed to be with." Brittany said.

"And so you could be with Artie." Santana said.

"I don't want to keep you from getting ready, but I felt like I should clear the air before you get married."

"Thank you Britt, I really appreciate it. And I wish you and Artie the best as well."

"Happy Wedding Day, San." Brittany said and turned to go. Santana caught her wrist, and pulled her into a gentle hug.

"Thank you, Britt." Santana said.

After Brittany left, Santana stood thinking for a moment about what just happened. Then she looked at the clock and frantically began to get ready.

About 30 minutes later, she was satisfied. She pulled half of her long dark hair to the side in a simple clip, and had the rest in soft curls. Her dress was black and clung to her curves and her heels were white (her play on a tuxedo).

"Santana, we are going to be late-" her Mother said, trailing off as she entered the bathroom and caught sight of her daughter.

"Wow."

"Is it ok? Am I underdressed? Weirdly dressed?" Santana rattled off and her Mother gently touched her shoulder.

"You are perfect. Now let's go get you hitched!"

Q*Q*Q*Q*Q

Quinn looked at her final appearance in the mirror. She was wearing a simple, pearl colored tea-length dress, and matching heels. Her cross necklace completed the simple outfit, and her hair was in soft curls.

She turned around to face her Mother, who clasped her hands together and smiled widely in approval.

"You look like a classic elegant bride; it makes your natural beauty shine even more."

"It's time, Mom." Quinn said, not feeling the least bit nervous.

SQ*SQ*SQ*SQ

As the wedding music began, the east and west doors of the chapel opened simultaneously. The girls had both wanted to see each other walk down the aisle, so they agreed this would be the best.

As they both paused in the doorways, Quinn was captivated by the elegance that Santana conveyed, while looking as sexy as ever. Santana's thoughts had been going a hundred miles an hour, but froze on the beauty that she was getting ready to marry, and a soft smile appeared.

Their fathers proudly walked them down the aisles, and then joined the mothers on the first pew.

As Quinn and Santana took hands, Quinn noticed that Santana had tears in her eyes. She thought she heard Santana's Mom whisper to Judy something about "You owe me ten dollars."

"We are gathered today to celebrate the love and joy between these two young women, and to unite their families. " the chaplain began. Santana tried to listen, but she found herself lost in Quinn's eyes. She was finally able to re-focus to hear the end of the spiel. "So, today we focus on the love that has blossomed between these two young women. To highlight this, as a surprise from their parents, we have a special slideshow. "

Quinn and Santana exchanged glances, and turned to smile at their parents. As the lights dimmed, pictures of their childhood came to the screen. There were pictures of their mother's, holding the babies together, and pictures of the two of them crawling and then walking.

Everyone laughed at a picture with Santana covered head to toe in mud, and Quinn giving her a disgusted look. The pictures morphed to junior high, and Quinn was surprised to see a picture she had forgotten about—it was in her "Lucy" stage, the year she turned 12. She had sent out party invites, but no one but Santana had come. Her Dad had taken the picture, and her mom and Santana were singing to her. Quinn started shaking with tears. She had forgotten that in those lonely days, there was still Santana.

Santana whispered in her ear, "I love you Lucy Q."

The next pictures were of Cheerios performances, and Glee club performances. Than it morphed to a few recent ones, mainly at the hospital. Quinn's favorite was one when Santana was on her lap, telling what must have been quite a story, as Santana's head was tilted back, and she was laughing.

The last picture faded in on the set of the pictures with the girls when they were younger with the flower. Santana hadn't seen the set earlier, and she gasped as she took it in.

"You always could make me smile." Quinn whispered to her.

The slideshow came to an end, and the chaplain prompted them to do their vows, that they had written themselves.

"I, Santana Marie Lopez, take you, Lucy Quinn Fabray to be my wife. You have always been in my life, and I can't imagine a day without you. You are like my Vitamin D, you bring out the happy side of me. I promise to protect you, and to go all Lima Heights on anyone who even looks at you wrong. I promise to be faithful to you, emotionally and physically. I promise that I will be by your side, no matter what happens. I am yours, until the sands of time wash this world away." Santana finished, and was surprised that there was not a dry eye left—she wasn't one for touching people with her words in a positive way. Quinn regained her composure and began her vows.

"I, Lucy Quinn Fabray, take you Santana Marie Lopez to be my wife. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me." Quinn has to pause as her tears won't stop coming. Santana steps forward and gently embraces her, kissing her temple softly. "You always know just how to be there for me—whether it is holding me, making me laugh, or yelling at someone for me. You are everything I ever dreamt of, and so much more. I promise that I will be there for you, every step of every day, through the dark days and the joyous days. I promise that you are the only one for me, that I will be faithful and true. I promise to never go to bed mad, and to wake you up with kisses every morning. I will be yours for eternity." Quinn finished, and met Santana's eyes which were filled with tears, as she smiled adoringly at Quinn.

The two exchanged their rings, and gave a simple kiss, suitable enough for their parent's eyes, that they agreed upon. Santana thought "screw it" to herself and dipped Quinn and deepened the kiss. As the kiss ended, she heard the parents laugh and applaud, and Quinn looked absolutely giddy.

They also knew their parents were on the edge of their seats, as the couple had kept it a secret from them, as to what they were going to do about their last name.

"May I present to you for the first time, Mrs. Quinn and Santana Fabray-Lopez." The chaplain announced, and their parents applauded again. Quinn and Santana had went back and forth about names, and they finally decided hyphenated was the way to go, to honor both families.

They both went to greet their parents, and their wife's parents.

"Wife." Santana murmured and everyone turned to look at her. "Oh my gosh. I have a WIFE!" she squealed.

"Did you just squeal?" Judy asked.

"No. No, that was not a squeal." Santana said, frantically trying to think of a cover up. "I think a popcorn kernel was stuck in my tooth and it made a weird noise as it finally came loose.

Everyone looked at her like she was crazy and then started laughing.

Quinn came over to embrace her, and whispered in her ear. "You are so whipped."

Santana almost rolled her eyes, but then she took in the scene around her. It was happiness, and laughter and love.

"If you tell anyone, I will revoke all bedroom privileges for a week." She whispered back.

"Wouldn't that be more torture for you than me?" Quinn asked smirking.

"You are just lucky our parents are here right now."

"Just say it."

"Say what?"

"That you are whipped."

"If I say it, will you drop it?' Santana asked through gritted teeth and Quinn nodded. "Fine, I'm whipped." She said and was rewarded with a kiss from Quinn.

Santana hoped that this signified that they lived 'happily ever after' but she knew that life was an inevitable roller coaster ride.


	12. Chapter 12

Sorry, I've been out of writing for awhile. Anyone still intereted?


End file.
